MM: some masaa-il of marriage

 Introduction

The institution of marriage is important for social cohesion, a fact almost universally accepted. It's role in Islam on a spiritual level is given in many Quranic verses and statements of the Prophet (Sall Allahu 'alayhi wa sallam), one of which is the famous quote "marriage is half of one's religion" ( At-Tirmidhee 3096). This subject often generates frequently asked questions (FAQs)(ft.1), so, for public benefit, they shall be addressed below.

(#1) Are there any Islamic texts which summarize the functions of the marriage relationship?

 A number of Islamic texts provide us with information on marriage. The Qur'an (Q 4:1) asserts that God created man and woman, the ideal relationship generating love, mercy, and overall satisfaction in life (Q 30:21). Similarly, it beautifully asserts that men and women are created to function as "clothing" (libaas) for each other ( Q 2:187), understood for mental, emotional, physical and indeed spiritual support. While the above texts can be seen in an emotional context, it also speaks on the importance of justice (Q 4:3) within the relationship. Admittedly, the latter quote is in the context of men vis-a-vis women (in the sense of maintaining the rights of women, not subjecting them to abuse), yet it can reasonably be said to go both ways, if we factor in Q 9:71, which asserts that both genders are "allies" of each other in terms of their spirituality and communal obligations, that such awareness and mutual assistance generates rewards from Allah in paradise (9:72).  

The Qur'an has placed this institution as something which brings forth social protections for the vulnerable as well (Q 4:3, 24:31, among other places).

(#2) How to find a suitable partner?

This is a difficult question, in light of societal and cultural expectations, which of course vary from place to place and time to time. While in the Muslim world there is family involvement (even to the extent of "arranged marriages"), for some, especially in Western environments, this could be untenable. The last two decades has seen the emergence of online dating as something that is now widely acceptable, however that can also be dangerous. 

In short, since the texts do not give us a step-by-step methodology, whatever halal (lawful) options available in our unique circumstances should be employed. Admittedly, we all have our differing comfort levels.

(#3) Can marriage occur outside of one's culture?

There are no restrictions on interracial/intercultural marriages present in the Qur'an and Sunnah. It is true that many scholars assert that a condition of marriage is comparable status (known by the technical term Kafaa'ah), but at the end of the day even that is more of some advice, rather than a ruling from the Islamic texts.

(#4) The role of Wali, and can a woman marry without his consent?

The Wali or Wakeel functions as a guardian, looking out for the best interests of the woman. Usually it is the father, brother or some other male relative, who will look for a spouse for the woman, to limit mistakes. Almost all societies-regardless of culture and religion- had this concept at some level.

Three of the four Sunni jurisprudential schools assert that the wali's consent is needed in order for the woman to get married. The Hanafi school argues that if the woman is mature and intelligent (Baalighah & Raashidah), there is no need for a wali's presence or consent. In practice, there is also a bit of a relaxed attitude on this point when the woman is a widow, divorcee, with life experiences, because it is expected that she knows what she wants and is comfortable with things. 

It is the Hanafi viewpoint which makes the most sense to this writer in a Western context, but I can also see the logic of the majority, when we consider that traditionally females marry young, without life experiences and particular expectations, as well as being more prone to misguidance and emotional manipulation. 

(#5) Should divorce be the immediate response to problems?

While divorce is legal in Islam, it should not be the immediate reply to relationship issues. Indeed, the Qur'an itself asserts that efforts are to be made- with an arbiter from each side- to solve the issues (Q 4:35). Emotions play a great hand in relationships of this nature, which is why expressions of talaq (divorce) are considered invalid when given during a woman's menstruation period(ft.#2)

(#6) Can a woman initiate divorce in Islam?

Within certain limits a woman can set forth a request for divorce, and-in summary- legitimate reasons include abandonment of the religion, outright abuse, gross neglect. The process of khul' would take place, in which a woman simply returns the dowry given to her husband. There is also, of course, divorce by mutual agreement.

(#7) Does a man have a veto power insofar as divorce?

The husband has more authority insofar as issues of divorce are concerned. Thus, it is relatively easy for a man to initiate divorce and is not necessarily obligated to grant divorce. While it can be argued this is patriarchy in action, I would say that it is a means to limit destruction and chaos based on emotion. 

Undoubtedly emotional mistakes can be made by both genders; however, men are not prone to the same sort of emotional output (and the consequences thereof) women experience. 

Moreover, it cannot be ignored that the Qur'an puts financial support in the field of the man, and that as a consequence exercise more authority than women. (Q 4:34). Under those circumstances, it would be natural for man to have a sort of (limited) veto power. Of course, in situations where the man is unreasonable, the woman can go to the Qadi (judge, divorce court in Muslim nation) or relevant body to, in a sense, force a divorce, however that would have to be for extreme circumstances. 

(#8) What does reconciliation look like?

Quite simply, even if a couple agree on a divorce, it can be revoked anytime within 4 months of its pronouncement by reuniting (jimaa').  There is a recognition that relationship dynamics are often fluid, emotions give way to intelligence and vice-versa. While I don't intend to go into much detail here (and there are details in the Qur'an itself), the short end of it is that there is more room for reconciliation than what is often believed. 

(#9) Are divorce decrees issued by non-Muslim courts valid?

This is a very complex question, made even more complicated by the fact that for many Muslim nations, a divorce decree from a non-Muslim country is not even considered, causing significant legal confusion for all involved parties(ft.3). 

Our view, in light of the fact that Imams and mosques in the West have no authority to impose decisions, nor ability to investigate properly the claims made by disputing couples, is that the court, in non-Muslim nations, with legal mechanisms, signed documents in the presence of witnesses, etc. overall fulfills the requirements given within the Islamic tradition. Of course, this may not always be the case, keeping in mind that the Islamic system has built-in devices meant to encourage reconciliation and stability.

(#10) Dowry

The dowry (mahr) is whatever is agreed to by the parties. It can even be symbolic. 

(#11) Wedding ceremony (Nikaah).

The normative fashion is that a minimum of two witnesses are required, a ceremony in which the parties are reminded of their responsibilities, and a clear acceptance of those responsibilities.  The Hanbali school has within it a view that even witnesses are not required, only publicizing the relationship is required (i'laan in technical jargon).

In our view, the normative fashion for nikaah is best, as it has more clarity and removes ambiguity. The cultural aspects of weddings vary from place to community, and while there are obvious financial difficulties in those, the religious aspects are very easy, and it is important to keep to the Prophetic guidance to make marriage easy.

Footnotes

(1) The term Masaa-il (sing, Mas-alah) is used for questions requiring an Islamic reply. Often books of Fiqh are replete with this FAQs format.

(2) The modern world tends to ignore and downplay the role of emotions, particularly in women, leading to unnecessary destruction of relationships. A Stanford Medicine Magazine article articulates very well that the minds of males and females have signifigant differences, for which see How men's and women's brains are different | Stanford Medicine

(3) A common situation is when a woman divorced in the US Legal system wants to either remarry or in some way totally break herself from the previous life, facing difficulties in her country of origin.  

 

REAL LIFE : ISLAMIC GUIDANCE ON TROUBLING ISSUES

 Introduction

Anyone familiar with Islam as an intellectual tradition will at some point come across collections of fataawa (sing.fatwa), in which the Mufti will provide answers to queries on issues ranging from rituals to business laws. Many works of this genre have survived for hundreds of years, and still provides insights to contemporary readers, such as the famous multi-volume Majmoo' al fataawa, a collection of the opinions of Ibn Taymiyyah  ( d.1328). 

Our intention here is not to provide fataawa, but rather to share succinct suggestions, based upon Islamic texts, on a variety of important issues that are faced by Muslims, in particular in the West Coast region of the United States. Much of the points below are equally relevant for non-Muslims. We are confident that the issues highlighted below, accompanied by answers as based on deen, will prove to be helpful in having a healthy and balanced life.

Intoxicants

The West Coast generally has a well-known liberal culture, differing in many ways not only from other nations, but regions in the country itself. Thus, it's approach to the consumption of intoxicants has reflected that reality. 

Alcohol, as well as items such as marijuana (cannabis) and tobacco products generally, although deemed largely socially acceptable, are known to create physical and financial harm. A NEW YORK TIMES article has highlighted this regarding alcohol Even a Little Alcohol Can Harm Your Health, Research Shows - The New York Times (nytimes.com)  

Tobacco use is very high, even among Muslims, many of whom have followed fatawaa arguing that it is not technically forbidden (haraam) but rather simply disliked (makrooh). Tobacco is both harmful and addictive, so much so that the manufacturers are required (by law) to list some of those harms on a pack of cigarettes and other products generally. A list of the harms provided by Mayo Clinic Nicotine dependence - Symptoms and causes - Mayo Clinic makes the argument that the best treatment is to stop consuming such items. 

The Qur'an has said that intoxicants, defined as that which befogs the mind, has more harm than benefit (Q 2:219) and is a repugnant tool in Satan's hands (Q 5:90). This should be sufficient for us as an alert to abstain from such products, even in (seemingly) "harmless" scenarios. 

Gambling

Much of the above information on intoxicants can likewise be said of gambling. The AMERICAN PHYSCOLOGICAL ASSOCIATION How gambling affects the brain and who is most vulnerable to addiction (apa.org) has highlighted the problems associated with it, manifested in new avenues of gambling now available. 

The Quranic verses cited above also have a mention of gambling. It may seem like simply a fun game. but it has long term devastating effects. Qur'an (5:90) says that if we want success (in life), that activity, even with small amounts of money, must be discontinued. 

Financial victimization

Too often we are hearing of this problem, an issue which can no longer be ignored. The most common form people, (particularly the elderly,) are targeted is that an email, text or a direct message on social media will be received promising heavy financial incentive if they (the victim) agree to "hold" money allegedly found in some exotic location.  Once the victim gives their bank details, they end up losing their money, rather than gaining a profit. Some tips on avoiding this problem are found Reports of Nevada-based financial scams: How to protect yourself (8newsnow.com)

Variants of the same scam include threats via text messages or email or what is commonly called honey traps, in which a person (usually a false identity) will express romantic interest in the victim, create a bond via text or internet communication to the point where the scammer will express a need for financial help, a pattern that continues until the victim is literally drained of their resources. Older men (but also elderly women) are most targeted because of living alone, limited family interaction, and less likely to generate suspicion. Another aspect of this is that victims, once realizing the scope of the deception, are often unwilling to report to the authorities, out of embarrassment and shame.  The American Association of Retired Persons have published a very good summary ​Online Romance and Dating Scams: How to Spot a Scammer​ (aarp.org)

Islam has provided a number of tools to limit exposure to dangers posed by such situations. It tells us not to waste our wealth, neither are we to be stingy (Q 17: 26-27), it encourages us to pursue financial security, but not to make it the sole reason of life (Q 2:201, 28:77), not to use wealth for foolish purposes (Q 2:188).  If something is too good to be true, it usually is indeed an indication of fraud. The Islamic scriptures clearly is against theft and fraud of all kinds, even stating harsh penalty for such ( Q 5:38, 83:1-6 and many more), thus, we should not be the perpetrators of it either.

Black Magic

There is much which falls under the term black magic, but our usage of this term refers to a sort of open or hidden flirtation with the occult. We have addressed this topic in detail  Shamsuddin Waheed: THE INTERSECTION BETWEEN THE OCCULT AND HUMAN LIFE . 

Our view is that such activities, while acknowledging the high probability of fraud and mental health issues present, it is vital for people to stay away from such interest, even if abilities to enter into that realm (for whatever reason) is actually available, because it is entering into a realm that unleashes those forces that are actually beyond our ability to control. Indeed, we are to seek God's presence in these regards, his protection from the entities in that realm (The last 2 chapters of the Qur'an). 

Difficulties in finding a spouse.

This is a serious problem for Muslims in the United States. The concept of marriage (in an American context) is already a failing institution in society as a whole, with a whopping 40%-50% of marriages ending in divorce! For Muslims, the added problem is in finding suitable matches, because of unrealistic expectations, immaturity, cultural differences, or even self-sabotage. 

It is our view that some alterations in our approach is necessary to remedy this problem. In some environments and contexts, polygamy would have to resorted to. More realistic expectations on the part of men and women alike are likewise required. Entertaining the possibility of relationship outside of one's race or culture is another option. This can admittedly be problematic, but it can be even more problematic when (for example) a second-generation person is paired with a person from back home, having actually two different cultures (despite originating in the same place or sharing the same ethnicity).  Moreover, in situations where a wali (guardian, usually a male relative, looking out for the needs of the single female relative) is not available, it actually seems prudent that a woman may have to take the untraditional steps of seeking out a spouse for themselves. 

Tradition tells us that before nabuwwah, Muhammad was working as an employee of a rich widow named Khadijah. She was older and seemingly well off. It was she, may Allah be pleased with her, who proposed marriage to him. In other words, she expressed initial interest in him. 

Most (Muslim) men working in a professional environment have become accustomed to a behavior and ethic that will rarely pursue a relationship, out of fears of a hostile workplace, in respect to actual company policies, or worrying about harassment charges and the like.   Everyone's situation is unique, yet in any case women may need to take the example of Sayyidah Khadijah, Radee Allahu 'anhaa, who saw something of interest in Muhammad. She proposed to him, and he went on, by the grace and design of Allah (S.W.T.) to become the seal of the prophets, Sall Allahu 'alayhi wa sallam.  Thus, it may be necessary for women to be direct in expressing interest when they encounter a potential spouse.  It is also important to learn the lessons of the Istikhaarah prayer  before seriously embarking on that journey.  See Shamsuddin Waheed: Reflections on Istikhaarah: the priorities of life

Toxic family/surroundings

Although now a vogue term, it is appropriate when describing those related by blood, yet are the most destructive. Abuse (both physical and emotional) is rampant, yet it is swept under the rug in the name of family honor. 

Family is arguably the most important social unit, particularly in Muslim cultures, second only to God, it is meant to be an incubator of love, loyalty and support. It can be reasonably stated that tribe is simply an extension of that network, but what happens when those traits are not present? 

Similarly, in a (so-called) religious circle, disagreements on theological points can lead to the most extreme conclusions, creating an environment of constant argumentation, or worse yet, when religion is actually used to justify toxicity, such as mentioned above. 

The Qur'an is actually very realistic in addressing this. It says " O believers! Indeed, some of your wives and your children are (actually) enemies to you, thus, be cautious of them"(Q 64:14).

The text actually mentions two more items, but the first item is to be cautious (fa-ahdharhum). This is intentionally vague, in the sense that it clearly allows the reader to figure that out for themselves what "taking caution" means. If family members or so called "friends" and "religious circles" are actually detremintal to your development (for whatever reason), a person (particularly one who has been victimized) had the right to seek out means for protection. If that means to stay away from such environments, limit contact and the like, so be it! The text goes on to say "If you pardon" (wa in ta'foo), meaning that you can understand the situation and chose to pardon, but still take precautions. If a drug addicted relative stole from you, you can chose to forgive, but in the future you would naturally be more careful regarding leaving your valuables in the open! Next, it states "Overlook" (wa Tas-fahoo), to be forbearing, to a point. 

یٰۤاَیُّہَا الَّذِیۡنَ اٰمَنُوۡۤا اِنَّ مِنۡ اَزۡوَاجِکُمۡ وَاَوۡلَادِکُمۡ عَدُوًّا لَّکُمۡ فَاحۡذَرُوۡہُمۡ ۚ وَاِنۡ تَعۡفُوۡا وَتَصۡفَحُوۡا وَتَغۡفِرُوۡا فَاِنَّ اللّٰہَ غَفُوۡرٌ رَّحِیۡمٌ

I understand Q 64:14 as giving choices rather than a sequential mode of action. In other words, a person facing those serious toxic surroundings is being given by Allah options to exercise as the person finds applicable. In these regards, I am actually taking a lead from the views of the great jurist Imam Abu Hanifah (d. 767), who made the same argument regarding Q 4:34. 

The Qur'an (Q 9:107) mentions that an imitation "mosque" set up by hypocrites, those who were actually involved in schemes against the Prophet (upon whom be peace). The Qur'anic revelation instructs the Prophet and the believers generally not to step into such a place, to not stand for prayers in such an environment, as it is better to be in an environment built upon good intentions and a desire for purity and growth (Q 9:108). 

Thus, be it in a "religious" or familial setting, Islam is clearly stating that we have the right to be in places and surroundings that are conducive for our growth, and that we have the right to make those judgements for ourselves and to take actions to have both personal and spiritual security. 

Emotional health

Much of the above can be connected to this issue as well, and while I am not going to comment on medicines prescribed by an authorized professional, I will say that emotional health has strong connections to correct beliefs and spiritual foundation. An authentic spirituality will provide strength in trying times. 

We have consistently taught that the Qur'anic recitation (particularly of verses that contain words of affirmation), five daily prayers, payment of charity and the like are tools to maintain one's health, but we cannot deny the need to add physical exercise in places where natural beauty is present, occasional entertainment that generates good feelings, and other such activities. More tips are given Shamsuddin Waheed: Mental & Spiritual Heath: An Islamic Perspective

 It is worth noting that modern life itself produces the foundations for emotional or mental health problems. Issues of poverty, housing, and financial instability are all by-products of a world order which has taught capitalism and individualism, when in reality these are very destructive. Thus, addressing those issues are also helpful in building up one's emotional health.   Wa Billaahit Tawfeeq.

What EVERY Muslim needs to know about Islam

Introduction

The acquisition of knowledge is a noble undertaking, yet it is one which takes time, patience and hard work. An organized system of presenting information will have periodic tasks, exams and tests to determine the student's abilities and retention of the data that had been delivered during the course of academic period. 

With religion, particularly the religion of Islam, a great deal of tradition, texts and opinions are available, all of which have a level of attraction and arguments, which can lead to a great deal of confusion and outright dysfunction on a basic religious level. This is demonstrated occasionally within self-study. A person who has, on their own, studied the Japanese language, memorizing vocabulary and grammar to a point where they deem themselves as having mastered it   will often be lacking the most basic of necessary information, and when confronted, will lose credibility. While this is not intended to belittle self-study(ft.1), it is something to be cognizant of.

The title of this article is taken from the maxim coined by Muslim scholars as a teaching tool. That maxim is "The knowledge of religion that is necessary to possess" (Al Ma'loom min ad deeni bid-Daroorah). This expression is typically used in a theological sense to emphasis what Muslims are obligated to understand and believe in.

This article departs from the normative theological uses (while not denying the legitimacy of that usage) in order to focus on the more practical applications which are often neglected or even ignored, precisely because of lack of understanding their importance. 

We recognize that there is a certain level of legitimate differences of opinions, beliefs and judgement calls within the Muslim community (which shall be addressed below), so we have focused on matters that are largely deemed agreed upon (Ijmaa') by all parties. 

The Five pillars

While the five pillars are indeed well-known because of one hadeeth (ft.2), there are details that are necessary to put into place in order for these pillars to actually construct something beautiful. Four out of five of those pillars are in the practical realm, rather than theological(ft.3), and are addressed below.

(I) Salaah: daily prayers

While it is well-known that one is to face Makkah (the Qiblah), it is also necessary to be in a clean state, physically and mentally. This is known as Tahaarah!  The place of prayer should also be clean and the salaah should not be offered in a place such as a restroom. The process of ablution (Wudoo') should occur before prayers, and the state of wudoo' becomes necessary to renew after using the restroom, flatulence, deep sleep, and of course intimacy requires a full bath (ghusl) before salaah.

The necessary texts to recite in the prayers are of course Soorah Al-Faatihah-the opening chapter of the Qur'an (with a high emphasis on any other Quranic texts as well), the terms of glorification recited in the bowing (rukoo'), prostration (sajdah), the testimony of faith (tashahhud) and the pleading for the Messenger and all believers (Salaat 'alan Nabi) done in the final sitting posture. (ft.4)

For Muslim men, we also want to add that the men function as prayer leader (or Imam) in the family. We must know (and teach, particularly our sons) the above, as well as the call to prayer (adhaan), the immediate summons (Iqaamah), the number of units (rak'ahs) for each prayer(ft.5), and how to organize for communal prayer (with family and friends). These things are relatively easy. Other details come as time goes on, as needed. However, in terms of necessary knowledge regarding the salaah, the above cannot be dispensed with. (ft.6))

(II) Fasting:

Every able-bodied Muslim is expected to observe the fast from dawn (fajr) to Sunset (maghrib) during the month of Ramadan. Exemptions are made for the ill, the traveler (musaafir), menstruating women and the like.  A common misconception in the West is that the fasting period starts at sunrise (shorooq). 

The starting and ending times of the fast are very important to observe. It is also a good time to observe more prayer, charity and Qur'an reading. 

(III) Zakaat:

The Qur'an connects prayer and charity (Zakaah) in multiple places, easily observed by even a cursory glance at the scripture. Unfortunately, this pillar is unnecessarily neglected.

It should be made a priority; in the same way our monthly bills are a priority. With the emergence of the internet and automatic withdrawals, paying it should be an easy task. For more on this, see Shamsuddin Waheed: Zakaat: Reflections on its application in the Western world

(IV) Hajj pilgrimage:

This pilgrimage to Makkah, the site of the Ka'bah, is contingent upon physical and financial abilities. Many people worry about the pilgrimage rites (manaasik) years before making the intentions to actually go, yet our advice is to simply wait until it is near time to go, when the travel arrangements have been made. 

Malaysian and Indonesian pilgrims, upon getting the visa, actually go through classes in preparation of it, in a very organized fashion. Moreover, pilgrims travel in groups, and most travel agencies will have a guide in the group to help with the rites. Indeed, when I was blessed to go on the Hajj, our group had a power-point presentation preceding our entry into the pilgrimage. 

Sunnah

The term "Sunnah" in a technical sense refers to the established tradition of the Prophet Muhammad (Sall Allahu 'alayhi wa sallam). The term is widely used to highlight the Prophet's unique worship practices that fall outside of those deemed obligatory. For example, before offering the obligatory dhuhr prayer (which consists of four units), he would do a voluntary salaah consisting of four units. People would call these "sunnah prayers" or simply "sunnah". 

Sometimes the term is seen as synonymous with Naafil, which means voluntary, however in a technical sense this would be an incorrect application, because a person can do an action on their own volition, and it has no immediate reference to something done by the Prophet.

Sects

Between 85-90% of Muslims globally fall under the category of Sunni (Ahlus sunnah wal Jamaa'ah). In a broad sense, the appellation means that they take from the Prophet Muhammad's tradition, as conveyed through his companions and family, for legal precedence. 

15% (some estimates are as high as 20%) of Muslims belong to the Shiite community. They have a number of sub-groups, but the main difference is that they assert that they take from a select few from the Prophet's family (Ahlul Bayt) for legal and theological information. 

While there are some deep and significant differences between the two groups, it should be mentioned that both agree on the fundamentals of faith as well as most secondary points.

Schools of thought

While both sects have varying schools of thought, our focus is on the four which remain among the Sunni community. These schools, known as madh-habs (the correct Arabic plural is Madhaahib), have slightly different methodologies in evaluating and applying Islamic texts in a legal application. 

The Hanafi school dominates South East and central Asia, as well as Eastern Europe, The Shafi's in Far Asia, parts of the Arab world. The Maliki school (although founded in Madinah) commands loyalty in North and Western Africa, and Hanbali in Saudi Arabia. 

As a result of slightly different methodologies, conclusions on certain legal minutia vary. In prayers, the Shafi'ees raise their hands (raf' yadayn) at every movement of prayer, while the Hanafis do so only when initiating the prayer (Takbeeratul Ihraam).

These things should not be viewed as issues to result in division. It should also be noted that the divisions above (among the Sunni schools) are not theological. The term used for jurisprudence, for deriving texts for legal (and often ritual application) is Fiqh.

Culture

Healthy and wholistic practices are welcome in the Muslim community. The Muslim world is actually very diverse in these regards, and while Muslims have much in common as a result of the religion, we also acknowledge the richness in variety of languages, foods, history and perspective.

From an Islamic perspective, we only "reject" that which is contrary to the Qur'an and Prophetic legacy. In other words, the values and clear guidance of the religion is primary reference for us, even if the culture says something else. A good example is the caste system. It perpetuates oppression and separation. Islam teaches equality of all before God (Q 49:13), thus, we follow Islam, not the cultural attitudes. 

Conclusion

The content of this article should function as a foundation for seeing where we need to be in a religious sense. It omits many details and follow up questions/comments are always welcome.

Footnotes

(1) For thought on study, see Shamsuddin Waheed: Simple and easy study methods

(2) The narration is reported by 'Abdullah b.Umar, and is found in Bukhari and Muslim's collections, however, there are other reports with similar content.

(3) The first pillar is the shahaadah, declaring belief in the One and only God (Allah) and acknowledging that Muhammad (peace be upon him) was God's messenger. 

(4) This is also known by names such as Durood Sharif, Salaat Ibrahimiyyah etc. I explain the significance of this invocation at around minute 13 in my recent 'Eid ul Ad-haa sermon, to be found Here: Eid-ul ad-haa 2023 

(5) For the daily obligatory prayers, the units are as follows: Fajr is two rak'ahs, dhuhr is 4, as is 'Asr. Maghrib is 3, and 'Ishaa is four rak'ahs. On Fridays, if in a mosque, the dhuhr is replaced with Friday (jum'ah) prayer, itself having two rak'ahs. The daily prayers can be prayed in congregation (Jama'ah), whereas most "Sunnah" prayers-if observed- are done on an individual basis.

(6) All of the schools recognize the need for Al-Faatihah to be within the prayers, and most recognize that the addition of additional Quranic content as constituting Sunnah (and Not obligatory). With that said, the universal practice is following this structure: Al-Faatihah, followed by another Quranic text, in the first two units of the salaah. Thus, it is important for all Muslims, especially men, to have more Qur'an committed to memory. The last section of the Qur'an (Juz' 'amma) contains short chapters and are thus ideal for use in the prayers. At a minimum, I would recommend learning by heart at least the final three Quranic chapters (112-114) and rotate them in your prayers. It also has the effect of making your salaah more impactful.

                                                                                               

Just what is allowed and not allowed in Islam? Addressing some commonly asked questions

               Just what is allowed in Islam? Addressing some commonly asked questions

Islamic doctrine asserts that Islam- surrender to God's will- has come forth through all messengers, finding its completion and perfection with the coming of the final scripture (Qur'an) to the final Prophet (Muhammad, Sall Allahu 'alayhi wa sallam).  In many ways, the Prophet Muhammad is like the Prophet Moses, upon both be peace, in that both have comprehensive legal systems associated with their teachings. It is the desire to obey Allah Almighty that has inspired the development of such systems. In these regards, we differ from Christianity, which largely has focused upon personal salvation, attainable through belief in the blood sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross.

This article does not seek to go into detail regarding legal issues, rather it will address commonly asked questions that center on issues such as dress, gender interaction, and cultural expressions. It should be noted that the premise of this article centers around two Quranic assertions, important verses which we have tended to marginalize insofar as understanding and applying Islam is concerned.

One of those verses reads:  " Say: My Lord has only consistently forbidden (harrama) immoral actions (Al-Fawaahisha), what is open as well as what is hidden (batan), sin and transgressions unjustly, that you associate with Allah that which He has sent down no authority, and that you speak about Allah what you do not know." (Q 7:33).

 

This shows us that God is not petty! The above text shows a general principle that Allah has prioritized that certain actions and attitudes are to be avoided, as they cause social and personal chaos. We have repeatedly presented as examples intoxicants, gambling, and the like, as contemporary problems that, if removed, would greatly benefit social stability.

The contrast is given in the text which borders the above citation, in which Almighty Allah asserts: " Say: Who has consistently forbidden (harrama) the attractive (items of) God (zeenatullah), which He has produced for his servants, and wholesome (tayyibaat) items from his provision? Say: they are for those who have faith (alladheena Aamanoo) in this life, and exclusively for them on the day of standing. Thus, We (Allah) does clarify signs for a people of knowledge." (Q 7:32)

 

Whatever is goodly, attractive and wholesome, that which benefits the physical, spiritual and social health of a person, this is welcomed by Allah! It is created by God for us to benefit from. If the two Quranic verses are remembered, in general we should have no problems in living by the religion of Islam.

 

It should be noted that cultural and personal tastes will naturally vary, so that factors in how we accept and judge things. Information on certain subjects will likewise has variance. Our judgements of what is lawful and what is lawful from a religious angle should likewise have evidence from the religious texts.

DRESS

Q1What is the dress code for Muslim women?

Islam teaches that in public, modest dress should be observed. Practically this means the hair and body. The Quranic texts assert that the reason for this dress code is to be viewed with respect (24:31), a means of protection from harassment and the like ( 33:59). A hadeeth of the Prophet further states that in public, only the hands, face and feet should be visible (Sunan Abu Dawud 4104).

Any cultural or personal style is acceptable from an Islamic perspective so long as the above requirements are met, and indeed, we find great diversity amongst Muslims in dress fashion. 

Q2 What is the dress code for men?

There is no text which directly addresses this, however there is consensus among the scholars that clothing should not be revealing, that the area between the navel and knees be covered. Many countries have laws against men going shirtless in public, and that is certainly a part of typical Muslim thinking as well. 

Q3 Do men have to wear headgear?

To our knowledge, there is nothing in the Qur'an or hadeeth literature which commands this. However, the literature does say the Prophet covered his hair, and certainly the head-coverings found in the Arab world offer protection from the weather elements. The covering of the head for men was considered (and in some places is still considered) good manners, and there has been scholars who historically considered abandonment of it to be an act of transgression (fisq). 

Moreover, there are also scholars, in particular of the Hanafi school of thought, who assert that it is preferable (mustahab) to offer prayers with a covered head. 

Yet, it is our view that the head coverings, as found in different forms throughout the Muslim world, is a cultural symbol, with little bearing on one's Islamic observance.

Q4 Are Suits and ties allowed?

There is no convincing evidence that the suit and tie is forbidden. The West has culture just as the East does, and as long as the requirements mentioned in Q2 are met, it should be fine.

Some have argued that the tie in particular is a symbol of the Christian cross, however there is no convincing proof of this. Others have taken the tie as a symbol of Western colonialism and is thusly frowned upon in places such as Iran. If one is convinced of the latter as an argument, then it is simply a matter of choice and preference, rather than religious mandate.

Q5 Pants above the ankles?

In the time of the Prophet, dragging one's garment (called isbaal in Arabic) was a way of showing off, a display of arrogance, and it is this attitude which was condemned by the Prophet. This explanation is almost universally recognized among Muslims, which is why generally full-length pants and garments are abundant.  Thus, we see no problem in this, if there is no arrogant display taking place. 

Q6 Can Muslim men wear gold and silk?

Although not mentioned in the Qur'an, it is forbidden by the Prophet in the hadeeth literature. In normal circumstances, men are the ones conducting business and activities in public life, and the wearing of gold and silk, especially in excessive fashion, can generate jealousy and even crime. Thus, we view it as forbidden (haraam), and best for Muslims to avoid.

Gender interaction

Q7 Is handshaking between the genders allowed?

In many Muslim cultures, particularly in the Middle East, South and Central Asia, it is inappropriate to have any physical contact with the opposite sex outside of one's family. 

Moreover, in the Shafi'ee school (dominant in Far East Asia), even a small touch, such as from a handshake, annuls one's ablution (Wudoo').  So, from a practical perspective, depending on one's surroundings, it may best be avoided, to prevent socially awkward situations.

There is no direct hadeeth on this issue, and the report usually cited to forbid handshaking between members of the opposite sex is disputed both in its content (matn) and its transmission (Isnaad).

In the West, as well as the professional world, it is deemed impolite to refuse a handshake. Moreover, as mentioned above, the report usually cited in order to forbid it is seriously disputed. Thus, it is our view that there's no problem with shaking hands. Those who take the Shafi'ee position (that even an accidental touch annuls one's Wudoo, as distinct from the other madhaahib who assert that it is sexual intercourse which renders purity void) find themselves at hardships in certain situations such as in Makkah and Madinah during Hajj time, when the crowds always push people towards each other. Some Shafi'ee scholars, as a result, take the position of the other schools just in that occasion.

Islam is a practical, easy faith, and it is not necessary for us to make it harder. Therefore, our advice is contingent upon location and context. In an of itself, we see handshaking as okay, this is also the fatwa from Al Azhar university, but one must be cognizant of local realities, which may demand NO handshakes or those in which handshakes would be required. 

Q8 Can a Muslim woman propose marriage to a man?

There is no problem with this.  Indeed, Khadijah (Radee Allahu 'Anhaa) did this very thing with Muhammad, a younger man, before the Prophethood.  

Q9 Is a guardian (wali) needed for a woman in marriage?

In three of the four Sunni schools yes, but in the Hanafi school it is not a requirement when the woman is deemed mature and intelligent (Baalighah Raashidah). The presence of a guardian is to look for the best interests of the female, who usually marries young and without life experiences. A woman with maturity and intelligence is free to conduct her life as she sees fit, so long as in keeping with Islamic values. Thus, the Hanafi view (as articulated in the Mukhtasar of Al Qudoori) is very logical.

Q10 Can there ever be communication/interaction between men and women?

Religiously, this is not a problem, however, this also depends upon the cultural surroundings. One must be cognizant of this, regardless of one's religious views. In any case, there is much evidence from the sources that show that interaction of this level is not a problem. Indeed, the Prophet's wife, Sayyidah 'Aa'ishaa, led an army (the battle of Jamal). There had to be communication between her and the commanders. She herself is a major source of hadeeth transmission, that would have to be communicated to men! These examples should be sufficient from a religious perspective.

Q11 What evidence is required from an Islamic perspective to prove adultery (Zinaa)?

The requirements are very strict, four witnesses (see Q 24:4,13) must see actual intercourse (dukhool). Other actions do not count as "zinaa". 

There is great wisdom in this, in that it limits false accusations to be leveled, and also allows for any potential issues to be resolved with the involved parties, rather than making a public spectacle.

Q12 Does a woman's voice constitute 'Awrah (something to be hidden)?

There is no evidence for that from the Qur'an or Sunnah. 

Cultural expressions

Q13 Is Music lawful?

There have been many authorities which consider it to be forbidden (Haraam), on the basis of some reports in the hadeeth literature, as well as an interpretation of the term Lahwil Hadeeth which appears in the Qur'an (31:6). However, the reports have been disputed since almost the very beginning of the Muslim intellectual history. Great scholars such as Imam Al Ghazali (see Ihyaa Uloom id deen )have praised the value of music, and the Quranic text mentioned above has no actual relation to music.

It is our view that immoral music is what is forbidden, as it encourages social disorder. This is the view of many great scholars and finds articulation by Shaikh Yusuf Al Qaradawi in his work Al Halaal wal Haraam Fil Islaam. 

Q 14 Can holidays other than the two Eids be observed by Muslims?

This depends on the nature of the occasion. Most occasions are secular in nature, and involve needed family and social interaction, which is encouraged by Islam. It is our view that holidays and occasions such as birthdays, national holidays, anniversaries, are not problematic at all. 

It can be argued that Christmas is a problem, but it is one easily solved. This question is particularly relevant for Muslims who have converted to Islam from a Christian background. One can join one's family in the social aspect (dinners for example), but not the religious aspect (church communion and the like). Simply skip the religious aspect, if there are any present.

Q15 What about Tattoos?

Some people get tattoos of their spouse's names, and other decorations. It is our understanding that such actions are haraam because they permanently alter one's body from its natural form. More importantly, scholars have given- as evidence for declaring it to be haraam, the Quranic assertion "Do not alter God's creation" (Q 30:30).

If one already has tattoos, it is in the past. However, we advise all readers not to get more tattoos. 

Q16 Can widows remarry?

In some cultures, this is frowned upon, however, there is nothing in the Qur'an or Sunnah which forbids it. Indeed, the Prophet Muhammad Sall Allahu 'alayhi wa sallam himself married widows.

                                                  

Are Muslims allowed to pray for Non Muslims ?

 Introduction

 

There are a number of issues that, while seemingly academic in the Muslim world, have real life implications in the wider global scene. Among those issues is that of praying for Non Muslims, both alive or dead. A related issue would be the question of giving Zakaat (The mandatory charity) to Non Muslim recipients. 

 

This issue of praying for Non Muslims is raised in the West due to mutual interactions and interests, where there is a greater chance of viewing the other in human terms (as opposed to a limiting label).  Online debates were in full force upon the death of Chadwick Boseman,( star in Black Panther) which saw some Muslims offering their condolences, including using traditional religious expressions such as "From God we come, to him is our return". 

There are texts typically cited in support of the notion that we are forbidden by religion from offering supplication on behalf of Non Muslims. Those texts are examined below.

Prophet Ibrahim 'alayhis salaam (Abraham)

It is not for the Prophet and those who have believed to ask forgiveness for the polytheists, even if they were relatives, after it has become clear to them that they are companions of Hellfire.

 

And the request of forgiveness of Abraham for his father was only because of a promise he had made to him. But when it became apparent to Abraham that his father was an enemy to Allah, he disassociated himself from him. Indeed was Abraham compassionate and patient. (Qur'an 9:113-114, Saheeh International  translation).

 

The above text is from the ninth chapter, which carries, among other names "Al-Baraa-ah", which means "disassociation". The Soorah itself is given during war context, according to all authorities.  A treaty had been entered into between the Muslims and the Makkan opposition, the latter breaking it(ft.1). 

The  Makkans were generally related by blood or tribe to The Prophetصَلَّىٰ ٱللَّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ‎  as well as his followers, yet- at that time- that did not stop them from waging war upon the Muslims . This text reminds the Muslims that in battle context, one must be strong, that emotional manipulation should not be allowed, even from family members, if such members have an agenda against you. 

 

This teaching is given voice elsewhere in the Qur'an:

 "  O you who have believed, indeed, among your wives and your children are enemies to you, so beware of them. But if you pardon and overlook and forgive - then indeed, Allah is Forgiving and Merciful." ( Q 64:14, Saheeh international translation).

It should be noted that even though the ninth chapter is given within a war context, it does not address the Mushriks en masse. Q 9:4 asserts that the previously referenced treaty remains in force for those who did not break it, meaning that a strong stance need only be maintained with those who have expressed danger via their actions!

 

Abraham's exampleعَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ - - is given, in that his father had been a clear enemy, taking many actions to actually put Abraham in danger of losing his life. If a parent or another loved one actually takes steps to take your life, at a minimum, one must protect himself from clear and present danger. This is something which is widely understood in the modern world, in that "family" and "friends" can actually be the worse of enemies, for a variety of reasons. (ft.2)

Thus, there is a clear difference between belligerent foes and those in one's family/circle who, while maintaining a differing religious identity, do not have enmity.

Hadeeth reports

Other reports exist in the hadeeth literature which forbids, at some levels or another, invoking God on behalf of Non Muslims. However, the majority of those reports have been declared weak or even fabrications by such luminaries as Shaikh Akram Nadwi. Some of them are outright contrary to the Qur'anic usage, while others clearly do not assert what is claimed in their name.(ft.3) Some have- for example, asserted that it is forbidden to initiate salaam greetings with Non Muslims, and that if initiated by a Non Muslim, the Muslim should respond with "Peace for those who follow guidance."(As salaamu 'ala man it tab'a'a al hudaa) Yet, the Qur'an itself says that one should respond with a similar or better greeting when addressed (Q 4:86), as well as asserting that one should not assume that the one making greeting is not actually a believer (Q 4:94). 

More evidence

The Qur'an calls Allah "The Caretaker of the Universe" (Q 1:2). That shows simply that Allah, the God of the Qur'an, of Muslims, and the world in general, cares for his creation, regardless of their particular label.

The same text allows marriage and consumption of food with huge segments of Non Muslim population ( Q 5:5). Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him)  is referred to as a Mercy for all nations (Q 21:107), The Qur'an likewise tells Muslims to keep strong family ties with Non Muslim members ( Q 29:8), and tells us to be just with all, and not allow religious differences to drive us in the opposite direction ( Q 60:8-9).

Conclusion

It should be apparent that there is no harm in making supplication for those who do not believe as we do, be they dead or alive. Of course, Allah's response is his business, and He says he can respond with mercy or punishment, even for those who are deemed as 'evil'. (Q 3:129-130). 

 

It should also be noted here that the Salaat Al Janaazah (funeral prayers) is a rite specific for Muslims. Quranic verses are recited therein, as well as supplications that are made by believing Muslims for believing Muslims, specific to particular Islamic theological assumptions. Thus, it is inappropriate for a Non Muslim to have that sort of funeral, just as it would be likewise a disrespect for a believing Muslim to be given a Christian funeral. This is more a matter of respect for one's religious life and identity, than it is an issue of conflict.(ft.4)

Notes

(1) The details of this are widely available, for which I would recommend The Life of Muhammad by Muhammad Husayn Haykal.

 

 

(2) All relationships have some level of review and renewal. Islam certainly calls for maintaining family ties, even with disbelieving family members, but it is likewise acknowledged in the Qur'an (64:14) that "enmity" can exist in one sense or another. The aforementioned text says to "take caution",  leaving it up to individual evaluation how that takes place. The same can be said for narcissistic, manipulative and jealous individuals outside of blood ties. An interesting article on this subject, by psychotherapist Sharon Martin, can be found at  https://blogs.psychcentral.com/imperfect/2019/10/its-okay-to-cut-ties-with-toxic-family-members/ . 

 

 

(3) The Prophetic tradition of saying "May Allah have mercy on you " (yarhamukumullaah) when a person sneezes is said to be altered when a Non Muslim sneezes to "May Allah guide you and rectify your condition", allegedly because it is forbidden to pray for "mercy" for a Non Muslim. Even supposing that report is true (although not mentioned in the saheehayn), it still is a supplication for the Non Muslim, and, moreover, that wording is also found in the practice of sneezing, i.e.,  The one who sneezes praises God, the one around them respond with the request for mercy for them, and the one who sneezed responds with "May Allah guide you and rectify your condition " (Yahdeekumullaah, wa yuslih baalakum).

 

(4)  It is often asserted that Muslims cannot attend the funerals of Non Muslims, due to the latter having their own religious beliefs contrary to Islam. This has no support from Islamic texts, and would totally destroy mutual respect among family/friends of varying religious labels. This writer has attended many non Muslim funerals, and has never felt any qualms in doing so. On the question of what to do if-in that situation, feeling uncomfortable in the Non Muslim funeral rites (for example, a Catholic funeral in which the mark of the cross (known as "signing") is made, the Muslim can simply don't do that, or any action that they may feel is contrary to Islamic teachings. 

 

These sort of social quagmires exist among Christian and Jewish communities as well, reaching vastly different conclusions. Rabbi Tovia Singer argues that Jews are allowed to pray in Muslim mosques but not even enter into a church https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moRM1YFdvyI  , The Jehovah's Witnesses, likewise,  forbid their members from even entering a Non J.W. worship site.