Importance reflections on worship: a focused vision

 Introduction

Among the struggles faced by many modern Muslims is keeping up with the rituals of Islam. This is a particularly important issue to discuss for Muslims in the Western Hemisphere and for those who have converted from a Protestant Christian background, a religious tradition that actually places a limited value to ritual.

It is our contention that the authentic Islamic activities are quite meaningful, and once understood, will serve as a balancing force for one's life and spiritual fulfillment. It is also our contention that part of the reasons behind the difficulties of the rites is that we end up focusing upon that which is, at best, traditional and optional (i/e. Sunnah/Nafl), to the point where the acts deemed obligatory get drowned out, the person becomes overwhelmed and either experiences a spiritual burnout or gives up totally. 

Thus, the purpose of this article is to bring our vision to a focus, centering upon key points, and making our rituals sources of peace and contentment. 

Aspects of Salaah

Qiyaam (standing position)

The daily prayers are initiated with intention (Niyyah), facing the Qiblah (the prayer direction, being the Ka'bah in Makkah), saying "Allahu Akbar" (God is the greatest) and the recitation which follows.

The obligatory text to recite is of course Soorah Al-Faatihah, the opening Quranic chapter. It is an appropriate text to invoke Allah subhaanahu wa ta'alaa on a regular basis. In it, we acknowledge God as being the Most Merciful, seeking Divine guidance and blessings on whatever state of affairs we are experiencing. (#1)

The first two rak'ahs (units) of any salaah have not only Soorah Al-Faatihah, but, in accordance with Prophetic tradition, some other Quranic passage as well. For beginners, we recommend any of the short texts, such as among the last three chapters of the Qur'an (Al-Ikhlaas, Al Falaq and An-Naas). For all, regardless of where we have started our Islamic journey, I highly recommend using Quranic texts that are meaningful and impactful to you. To accomplish that, one must have a deep connection to the Qur'an, read it often and memorize passages of particular import to you. That process of memorization can then be used inside of the salaah itself. We are also advocating that the meaning of the passages in question be understood by the person.(2)

Rukoo' and Sajdah (bowing and prostration)

The bowing and prostration are not only times when the expressions Subhaana Rab-be al 'Adheem and Subhaana Rab-be al A'laa (Glorified is my Lord the magnificent, Glorified is My Lord the Highest) respectively are recited, but these are also good times when one can invoke God for one's needs. That particular request need not be done in Arabic, and when praying alone, a person can spend as much time in those postures as desired. In particular, the sajdah (prostration) is a place where we are closest to God, at least according to the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad, upon whom be peace and blessings. 

Extended sitting posture (Jalsah)

The normative practice is that a 4–5-line text is recited in the first extended sitting position, a text known as the tashahhud, and that the final sitting posture has both tashahhud and a text invoking Allah to bestow support and blessings to the cause of the Prophet and the entire Muslim community, this text is known as the durood sharif.

In particular, we have noticed that this text is difficult for many to learn in a timely manner, especially the durood sharif (which has repeating lines in Arabic).  In light of this, and other factors given below, it is our recommendation that in these postures, that the core, central and obligatory factors be zoomed in upon, immediately learned and easily applied. 

The Muwatta of Imam Malik has at least five different versions of the tashahhud recorded, with minor and major wording variations. All of them as well as other versions, have therein the statement of faith acknowledging Allah alone deserves worship, and that Muhammad was the messenger of God. This is what should be zoomed in upon. (3)

Similarly, if we were to zoom in on the core meaning of the durood, captured in the Arabic words Allahumma sawlee 'ala Muhammadin wa 'aala aali Muhammad, asking God to bestow support on the Prophet (as a person and as a cause) and upon his followers (the entire Muslim community), it should make things easier. (4)

Dhikr

In a ritualistic sense, dhikr- remembrance of Allah- is conducted using one's finger joints or by use of beads (known as tasbih or misbahah), reciting (either in a low or loud voice) expressions of praise for God (such as Subhaan-Allah, Alhamdulillaah, Allahu Akbar), selections from the other titles of Allah given in the Qur'an (such as Ar-Rahman, Al-Malik, etc). This is often done after salaah, and it is recognized that it can be done at any time and place.

However, it is also true that the Qur'an uses the term in a much more profound sense. 

اِنَّ فِیۡ خَلۡقِ السَّمٰوٰتِ وَالۡاَرۡضِ وَاخۡتِلَافِ الَّیۡلِ وَالنَّہَارِ لَاٰیٰتٍ لِّاُولِی الۡاَلۡبَابِ

الَّذِیۡنَ یَذۡکُرُوۡنَ اللّٰہَ قِیٰمًا وَّقُعُوۡدًا وَّعَلٰی جُنُوۡبِہِمۡ وَیَتَفَکَّرُوۡنَ فِیۡ خَلۡقِ السَّمٰوٰتِ وَالۡاَرۡضِ ۚ رَبَّنَا مَا خَلَقۡتَ ہٰذَا بَاطِلًا ۚ سُبۡحٰنَکَ فَقِنَا عَذَابَ النَّارِ

"Indeed, in the creation of the heavens and the earth and the alternation of night and day are signs for people of discernment, those who remember Allah (yadhkoroona Allah) while standing, sitting, relaxing on their sides, in a state of contemplation regarding the heavens and earth (such people assert) "Our Lord, you have not created (all of) this in vain (baatilan), glorified is you, protect us from the penalty of the fire." ( Q 3:190-191)

Another text famously says, "and the remembrance of Allah (wa ladhikrullaah) is the greatest source (of inspiration and power)." ( Q 29:45). The context of this verse clearly puts dhikr as the salaah itself. 

These verses should be sufficient to demonstrate that dhikr is much bigger than a ritual, be it in a solitary or communal fashion. It can happen internally, without any rites per se, yet we freely admit that the rite of salaah as well as traditional dhikr can serve the function of generating awareness of God. 

Du'aa

The term du'aa has the meaning of calling and is used in the sense of "prayer" that most westerners would be familiar with. Indeed, du'aa is sometimes translated as "prayer". In a ritualistic sense, we often do du'aa immediately after the conclusion of the salaah. The Qur'an and hadeeth literature both contain du'aa texts, beautiful and profound content. While we do encourage using these texts in one's calling upon God, we also acknowledge that one can (and should) invoke God with one's own heart, in one's own words, with sincerity, and that such action is beyond legislation. In other words, there are no rules for making du'aa. Traditionally it is done with open hands, with the face being wiped, ending with "ameen", however du'aa, like dhikr, need not be a ritual either. Yet, we do not see any difficulty in maintaining this action in the normative rite. 

The  du'aa texts of the Qur'an and hadeeth also have a benefit of teaching us what to pray for, of helping us to zoom in on the priorities. Let us take into consideration some of these texts.

" Our Lord, bestow on us that which is pleasant in this world, and that which is pleasant in the hereafter, and protect us from the penalty of the fire." (Q 2:201).

رَبَّنَاۤ اٰتِنَا فِی الدُّنۡیَا حَسَنَۃً وَّفِی الۡاٰخِرَۃِ حَسَنَۃً وَّقِنَا عَذَابَ النَّارِ

This text clearly teaches people of faith to have balance, to seek comfort in this life, while not neglecting the life to come, an existence which is cultivated by virtues such as truth, patience, faith and acting on that faith (Q 103:1-3).

"Our Lord, bestow on us mates and offspring who will be a comfort to our eyes, and make us a leader for those with reverence." (Q 25:74) 

رَبَّنَا ہَبۡ لَنَا مِنۡ اَزۡوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّیّٰتِنَا قُرَّۃَ اَعۡیُنٍ وَّاجۡعَلۡنَا لِلۡمُتَّقِیۡنَ اِمَامًا

This du'aa teaches us the type of families we should seek, that we should cultivate, long term, our taqwaa.  This is also indicated in the normative tashahhud text, which reads, in part "Peace be upon us, and on the righteous servants of God." (As salaamu 'alaynaa wa 'alaa 'Ibaadelaahis saaleheen).

The scholars have posited a number of recommendations when it comes to du'aa, among them is that some expression of praise for God should be made, there be an expression of seeking peace for the Prophet Muhammad, that seeking things which God has forbidden in the Islamic texts is not proper, and that one should pray for others. In other words, we should not be selfish in our du'aa.  A beautiful report asserts that the Prophet himself (sall Allahu 'alayhi wa sallam) asserted that du'aa is the core of worship (Mukhkhul 'ibaadah), while another says it is-in fact- worship itself. (Ad-du'aa, huwal 'Ibaadah).(5)

Endnotes

(1) For more on Al-Faatihah, see Shamsuddin Waheed: Al-Faatihah: a re-examination (Halaqah notes)

(2) Regular reading of the Qur'an, even in translation, is very beneficial. While I have much of the text committed to memory (for which I am grateful), I only use specific Quranic content in prayers, texts on Divine mercy and the like. I suggest the same approach, use Quranic verses or chapters whose meanings are touching to your own heart.

(3) Some of the interesting variants include the expression "Peace be on the Prophet" (As salaamu 'alan nabiyy") rather than the usual "Peace be on you, Oh Prophet!" (As salaamu 'alayka ayyuhan nabiyyu..). I prefer the former, which is given in three of the reports contained in Imam Malik's Muwatta (hadeeth collection). The Shiites recite a similar tashahhud and durood, but in sequences largely unfamiliar to Sunnis, yet, in all of the variants we find the presence of the necessary elements, acknowledging God and His Messenger, praying for him and his followers.

(4) Other titles for the prayer for the Prophet and his followers include Salaat Ibrahimiyya, Salaat 'alan Nabi, and salaatwas-salaam, or simply "salawaat". I have not used those titles so as not to confuse the readers, as "salaah" is the term used for our daily worship. Durood Sharif is the title of the prayer for the Prophet in Urdu/ Farsi languages. For more on the origin and concept of invoking God for the messenger and his followers, see Shamsuddin Waheed: Conception of Salaat 'alan Nabi in light of the Qur'an and Sunnah.

(5) Both of these reports can be found in Bulugh Ul Maram, a hadeeth collection by the 14th century scholar Ibn Hajr Al-'Asqalanee.  The above mentioned Muwatta of Imam Malik is considered by many scholars, including Shaikh Akram Nadwi, as having a more authoritative status than even the saheehayn, being as it is essentially the first hadeeth compilation. Imam Malik Ibn Anas was born in 711CE and it is largely upon his ideas that the Maliki school of jurisprudence is based. Born in the Prophet's city, Madinah, today his school dominates as the legal authority in much of North and West Africa. 

Coffee and Converts

( Note: below you will find our recent presentation at "Coffee and Converts" program, held at Masjid Ibrahim Las Vegas. In it, we share thoughts on navigating the challenges, both from inside and outside Muslim circles, and developing a healthy Islamic foundation. A brief Q and A session follows. This video is highly recommended to all viewers, regardless of their backround.)


COFFEE AND CONVERTS

THE PATH OF THE PROPHETS: TIMELESS GUIDANCE

( Note: The following is an edited version of our Salaat al Jumu'ah Khutbah delivered 1/4/19 at Masjid Ibrahim, Las Vegas, Nevada. The opening Hamd, as well as the expressions of peace for the Messengers of God, have been omitted here.)

The Path as described by the Qur'an

لَہٗ مَقَالِیۡدُ السَّمٰوٰتِ وَ الۡاَرۡضِ ۚ یَبۡسُطُ الرِّزۡقَ لِمَنۡ یَّشَآءُ وَ یَقۡدِرُ ؕ اِنَّہٗ بِکُلِّ شَیۡءٍ عَلِیۡمٌ
 شَرَعَ لَکُمۡ مِّنَ الدِّیۡنِ مَا وَصّٰی بِہٖ نُوۡحًا وَّ الَّذِیۡۤ اَوۡحَیۡنَاۤ اِلَیۡکَ وَ مَا وَصَّیۡنَا بِہٖۤ اِبۡرٰہِیۡمَ وَ مُوۡسٰی وَ عِیۡسٰۤی اَنۡ اَقِیۡمُوا الدِّیۡنَ وَ لَا تَتَفَرَّقُوۡا فِیۡہِ ؕ


In the Tafseer field, there is a principal known as Tasfeer ul Qur'an bil Qur'an, meaning that the Qur'an is best explained or understood by referencing other places within the Qur'an. Often, this practically means studying the context in which a particular verse or assertion is placed, rather than developing a stand-alone understanding based on a single text. Here, we have a beautiful example of this principal.

" To Him ( i.e. Allah) belongs the keys of the heavens and the Earth. He widens provision to whom He wills, and limits ( as well). Indeed, He is the One knowing all things." ( Q 42:12)

In other words, God is the "owner" of the universe, and as the one who possesses the keys, to open and close doors, Allah does that for whom He wills, in accordance to His plan and wisdom, according to his own schedule. Other texts to recall in these regards include Ayatul Kursiyy (ft.1) and Ayah An-Noor(ft.2).

Next, we are told " He ( Allah) has made you ( O followers of Muhammad) traverse on the same path, in terms of deen (Shara'a lakum min ad deen) which We (Allah) enjoined on Noah, which has been sent to you (O Muhammad), and what has been enjoined on Abraham, Moses and Jesus-establish deen, and do not place division therein.." ( Q 42:13).

These verses are to be read together, as they clearly indicate that Allah opened the doors of spiritual provision to the followers of Prophet Muhammad, the same doors He (soobhaanahu wa ta'alaa) opened for four other prophets.

These four prophets are all associated with safety on some level. Noah and his ark, Abraham's teachings, which-when followed, "save" a person from idolatry, Moses, who led his followers away from the tyranny of Pharaoh, and Jesus, who was leading people away from the traps of anger and self-deception.

To be on that path, the path of maximum benefit and safety, is truly a blessing This is why we should be consistent in  proclaiming praise to Allah for the blessing of Islam (Alhamdulillaahi 'ala Ni'matil Islaam).


The operative word is "path". On this path, there are people ahead of us and people behind us. In this ayah, Allah says to "establish deen, and don't create division therein" (Aqeemud-deen, wa Laa Tatafarraqoo feeh.). 

"Establish" means to build, and building takes patience, intelligence and planning.  It takes team work as well, to establish firmly deen, be it in personal or communal application.

In whatever stage of the journey we are on, we should help each other and remember that it takes patience, commitment, and planning. So have the Niyyah to build up your deen, not only in practice but in particular in thinking right.

Addressing sectarian divisions

The verse (42:13) also asserts that there should be no breaking apart or divisions with regards to deen. This assertion can be taken in a number of ways. We can take it as a command (amr) for unity, meaning not to break up into sectarian denominations, or it can be taken as instructing us to recognize that the prophets and messengers all taught the same deen, and thus, we should not view them as teaching different things, also implying that we should make no distinctions between God's messengers ( Q 2:285).

A reply to the above can be made, pointing out that there are divisions among the Muslim community. This is true, among the Ahlus Sunnah we have different Madhaahib (ft.3), and of course the main sectarian difference being with the Shiites. However, in general these divisions are on secondary points (furoo') and not on fundamental principles(usool) . Thus, all Muslims, of all theological colors, have the same Qur'an, the same pillars of faith, same prayers, and same ethical and behavioral principles.

This is a reflection of Allah's blessing for the deen, a deen which has been completed and protected ( Q 5:3). Thus, in the big scheme of things, the sectarian divisions among Muslims should not be exaggerated.

Footnotes

(1) The "Throne verse" ( Q 2:255), for which see here

(2) ''The verse of God's light" ( Q 24:35) , which describes the reach of Allah's guidance. See here

(3) The schools of jurisprudence only differ in terms of applications of legal methodology, and not really on theological points. There are theological differences between the Sunnis and the Shiites, some of them important, however in terms of fundamentals, both groups share that in common.

Struggling to submit: thoughts on what it means to be a Muslim

Daily we encounter examples that illustrate the hardships faced by those who are conscientious of their faith. It's true that Muslims are not the only ones with these struggles, as recently demonstrated by Kim Davis, a Kentucky county clerk who refused to issue marriage licenses for homosexuals, however Muslims, especially in a Western context, have much more to deal with, especially considering that Islam is widely seen as a foreign religion  that is incompatible with Modern values, and often Muslims in the West are ethnic and racial minorities who automatically generate scrutiny.


At least for the "born Muslims", there exists more social support. "Born Muslims" have a backround in some Islamic culture somewhere. All of their family members are Muslims and are, even if not practicing, comfortable at home and in their professions. But what about the person who spent time investigating religion, perhaps going through a crisis of faith, and discovers Islam for themselves? Surely, such persons will have a different struggle. In many ways their struggle will be even more rough than the born Muslim in the West. The person who accepts Islam on their own has to deal with family dynamic, that will be reflected in problems both big and small.


Recently the media highlighted the case of Charee Stanley, an airline flight attendant. As a "new" Muslim, she has been learning about her faith and applying it, and upon learning about the religion's prohibitions on alcohol [which includes serving it], she stopped serving it on flights. What she would do was to have co-workers serve it. Eventually, a detractor raised an issue, and she was subsequently suspended from her job at ExpressJet.[ See Stanley's interview on The View. https://search.yahoo.com/yhs/search?p=charee+stanly+on+the+view&ei=UTF-8&hspart=mozilla&hsimp=yhs-002].

How this particular case will play out in the airline world and perhaps the courts remains to be seen, but what was interesting to this writer is the diversity of views, even surprising ones from unexpected sources, such as Sheikh Yasir Qadhi [head of the Al-Maghrib institute], who found her position "clearly unreasonable" , creating future hurdles in accommodating "reasonable issues" such as Hijaab and beard.

So, what about the worker in a business that sells alcohol? In some places in USA, most of such businesses are owned and operated by Muslims. Similarly, Muslims work in the stock market, in the banking system, restaurants, hotels and the like.
On issues relating to alcohol and drugs, this writer feels very strongly that these are categorically Haraam and that Muslims are to not enter into such activities for their livelihood. Yet, the truth is that people-including Muslims- need to earn an income. Even attaining a degree usually requires acquiring loans, in which interest will always be a component.

So what do we do? On a personal level, there may or may not be easy solutions. Some may be able to get along very well without attaining a college degree, to buy their vehicles without resorting to loans, while for others this may very well be impossible. The same can be said of those in other businesses or sources of income that are questionable or clearly Haraam.

While we have concentrated on income, the struggle can capture many other areas of life. Persons in relationships that are not marriages. Marriage with Non Muslims, family dynamics, struggling with the social life, and many other areas.

Institutional building is needed


If we are going to live in the West, we have to recognize that these situations will not simply go away. These types of problems will continuously pop up, and-in fact- will endure. On an individual level, Muslims may be able to control their diet, the moments they pray, the clothes they wear. This person may even be blessed with a magical solution to all of their issues,yet, we must say, that American Muslims of all sects, nationalities and orientations, must work together to create united efforts to minimize [if not totally eliminate] the need to find our bread and butter in questionable occupations. That means Muslims must form their own banks/credit unions, they must create funds and open up housing for New Muslims, they must cooperate, live in their own neighborhoods, form strong bonds that will have an impact both socially and politically.

Personal level- do what you can

To use an analogy, all of us look at the ingredients when shopping at a grocery store. Mainly, we search to make sure our food is not Haraam, but some mistakes may end up being committed along the way, out of ignorance or necessity. But we have to keep making effort to make sure our food is actually lawful.


If a person is in a questionable  business, he or she should strive to find a better -Halaal-job. Make some effort. Allah says that he provides from sources a person cannot even imagine, if that person has Taqwaaa. [Q 65:2-3]. If he or she has a relationship that's not marriage, the solution, if love and compatibility are there, to get married. In terms of income issues and education, housing etc, a family can work together- share all the expenses, and end up avoiding Ribaa, paying off loans, paying for an education. But all of this requires patience, discipline, foresight, and intelligence. It also requires thinking as family, thinking as community, thinking and acting based upon the interests of the big picture.

Consider the story of the Barrientos sisters. These four Texas sisters were able to eliminate $180,000 in debt in just eighteen months by sharing the load[ see http://abcnews.go.com/Business/texas-sisters-erased-182k-debt-18-months/story?id=33485609]

Islam sees the spiritual and the material as connected to each other. Even our food can affect our souls. Our financial situation can color our relationship with God. That's a simple fact, regardless of whether we like it or not. So we have to have faith, use the minds given to us by Allah, take some actions and go from there.

Developing an approach for leaders within Western Muslim communities: focusing on knowledge

In the Muslim world, the job of the Imam or Shaykh is usually well defined and of a limited scope. He leads daily prayers in a mosque, teaches Qur'an and Hadeeth, and delivers lectures from time to time. For scholars of greater knowledge and fame, their roles are more than likely be confined to traditional academia, teaching everything from Sarf to Usool ul Fiqh.

In the Western context however, it's a very different experience. The Imam may do all of the above, or parts of the above, but is also the marriage counselor, visiting the shut-ins and the dying, the translator and even the janitor. He is a politician, a media consultant, and more.


Moreover, while an Imam from anywhere in the Muslim world is used to a homogeneous audience, sharing the same culture, worldview, experiences and the like, the Imam in a Western nation faces an extremely different situation. Muslims in the West are from a variety of ethnic, sectarian, madh-habi, cultural and educational backgrounds,  Add to this those accepting Islam from a completely Western pedigree!

Therefore, we would like to share some points of advice, relevant to Imams but also the governing bodies of Islamic Centers. The advice centers mainly around education. By "education", we mean more than a degree. We mean keeping that knowledge fresh, continued reading on these subjects and introspection.


Items needed for a Western Imam

[1] Deep knowledge of all the Fiqhi and 'Aqeedah trends within the Muslim Ummah

In the USA you will find Muslims from all areas of the world but also all over the map in terms of their Fiqh, their theological stances, and the like. There should be unity as much as possible among Muslims, and their particular Madhhabi practice[s] should not deter from that. "And hold fast to the rope of Allah, and do not be divided..", says the Qur'an [ Q 3:103].

The Imam can have his choice of Fiqh, to follow what he feels is correct, and he can even explain that choice to the community, but he must always be prepared to see others with slightly different practices and to avoid isolating anyone because of their particular practice.

We would kindly suggest to all Imams, regardless of what particular trend they follow, to be open to study of all the Madhhabs, 'Aqeedah differences, within the Muslim community.

[2] Other faith traditions

Obviously Judeo-Christian norms are the religious base for most Western cultures. Moreover, since Islam is widely seen as the third in that series of monotheistic religions, it's imperative that the Imam know about Judaism, Christianity and their scriptures, history, impact in local affairs, and the like. If the Imam is not strong in this area, he should never answer queries centered around it. "Answering" questions when in fact one is ignorant of the subject will only make the one answering look foolish, and it makes the Mosque/ Islam itself look bad.

A personal anecdotal story, I brought a Catholic to a mosque for a lecture, the lecturer decided to speak on the Islamic view of the crucifixion. The speaker went on a rant for one hour, making factually incorrect statements, insulting Christianity and Christians in the most ignorant fashion. Obviously it did not make a good impression.

We all have our strengths and weaknesses, but we should not pretend to know if we truly don't.

Conclusion

We live in a world where it is so much easier to obtain knowledge, or at least glimpses on this or that subject. Admittedly Google searches and the like has its strengths and weaknesses, even the study of books can have its limitations, but we should be open, especially if we are going to be speaking to people on faith issues on a regular basis. In addition to religious, cultural and historical knowledge, it's a good idea to become acquainted with counseling techniques, social sciences, take a speech class, seek to understand the local surroundings, the music, and so forth.

This not only makes the speaker a better speaker, it enriches the speaker. The Imam grows spiritually, he grows in Wisdom, as a result of these efforts.

Wa Billaahit Tawfeeq.

Keeping it real: some thoughts on the struggles of the Islamic 'convert'.

Islam is the fastest growing religion in the world . This is something acknowledged by friend and foe alike, despite the fact that there are actually very limited [if any] organized efforts at missionary work, of the kind that Christian missionaries engage in. There are many reasons behind this growth, far beyond the scope of this article, but nonetheless there are certain commonalities in terms of the struggles the new Muslim may find themselves in, especially in Western countries. Below are some guidelines, important for both the 'convert' and the Muslim community activists, Imams, employees and teachers.

[1] Muslim: first and foremost

Within the Islamic community as well as the media, titles such as 'convert' or 'revert'[ft.#1] are commonly used. It is our view that such titles, to be used even for people who have been Muslims for over 20 years, are artificial, and, most dangerously, makes an implication that Muslims born into the faith or whose origins are from Islamic nations are more authentic and superior to the newcomer. These sort of assumptions are incorrect and are contrary to the teachings of the Qur'an and Prophetic Sunnah. It should be sufficient to cite the following Quranic assertion:

" Verily, in Allah's sight the most honorable are those with the highest amount of Taqwaa in your midst." [Q 49:13]

[2] Intra community relations

It is often the case that the new Muslim feels alone in the mosque. In  the United States, most of the mosques are filled with a mixture of ethnic groups, sectarian tendencies and even generational differences.The new Muslim may feel disheartened, lonely. It is incumbent on the community to not only be welcoming, but to be accommodating, have classes on the necessities of practice, to build real social relations, but also to have respect for the new Muslim. Know that the new Muslim is not, NOT, required to adopt the attitudes, food and clothing of a different culture. Corrections of each other should never be done in arrogance or spite.
There is suppose to exist a relation of respect and equality between Muslims, regardless of racial backround or history.

"The believing men and women are protecting allies of one another, commanding what is right [by universal standards ] [ft.#2], forbid what is disgusting [Munkar], establishing prayers, pay Zakaat, obey Allah and his messenger, it is they whom Allah bestows mercy, verily Allah is powerful, wise." [Q 9:71]

[3] In the wider society: family and friends

There are a number of trends, both healthy and otherwise, that are found in the enthusiastic brother or sister who has accepted Islam. Indeed, the  struggle to do right and resist the influences of  the pre-Islamic lifestyle are in a tug-of war, being most visible during holidays and in social interactions. Below is a summary of issues and an Islamic response.

[A] Name change

Very often Muslims change their names. While this is acceptable, let it be known that the only names that have to be changed are names that have a bad meaning or names that imply worship of something other than God. In Sunan Abu Dawood, the blessed Prophet Muhammad [sall Allahu 'alayhi wa sallam] is said to have changed a person named shaytaan [satan] to another name, or of a person named Harb [war] to Salm [calmness], and the like. In the Prophet's days, and even today among Bedouins, a rough or ugly name was seen as toughening up the child to survive in a harsh world. But it is the messengers of God who teach that a goodly name is among the best things parents give to their children.

[B] Religious differences creating family tensions

From our side, we are to keep to our religion, but strive to keep good relations with family. The Qur'an itself asserts

[Revere thy parents;] yet should they endeavour to make thee ascribe divinity, side by side with Me, to something which thy mind cannot accept [as divine],  obey them not; but [even then] bear them company in this world’s life with kindness, and follow the path of those who turn towards Me. In the end, unto Me you all must return; and thereupon I shall make you [truly] understand all that you were doing [in life].’'[ Q 31:15, Muhammad Asad translation]

[C] Holidays [Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter etc]

This is probably the most sensitive of issues, because it is during the holiday seasons that serve as the bonding periods among families. Our advice is to not participate in the religious aspects of these activities. After all, Christmas [to highlight an example] celebrates the birth of Jesus, whom Christians believe to be God and the son of God. As Muslims we obviously don't accept these doctrines, so it would make no sense to celebrate it. But we see no harm in dining with the family in this time. Family relations are very important in Islam. So, in the dinners, if pork and alcohol are served, simply don't eat those items. Similarly, if the family observes Non Islamic religious rituals, such as going to Christmas services, don't go to that, but catch up with them later.[ft.#3]

Footnotes

[1] The term "revert" stems from an understanding that Islam is something innate in human beings, therefore, when we accept Islam, we are not changing, rather, we are "reverting" back to our original nature. This understanding itself is based on the hadeeth:  " Every child is born upon the natural disposition [Al-Fitrah], his parents make him Jewish, Christian or Zoroastrian." [Bayhaqi]

[2] Al-Ma'roof: Those healthy, recognized and accepted universal values that are needed for every society.

[3] It is well known that many of the holidays, including the religious holidays such as Christmas and Easter, have origins in pagan culture and belief. Be that as it may, in the West these occasions are observed and families take advantage of them by having family gatherings. It is the family gatherings that we are emphasizing here. It is often argued that even to do this is to engage in compromising one's Islam and pollute the faith with innovations [Bid'ah]. But we find this reasoning to be flawed for a number of reasons. [1] We accept to be paid extra  to work at these times. [2] We shop on 'black friday'[the day after thanksgiving], looking for deals. [3] Most of us are off work on Saturdays and Sundays, which are the sabbath periods for Jews and Christians respectively, and even the mosques, taking advantage of the day of rest and worship in the West, have major activities on both days.

It is for each person to make their own decisions based on their own conscious when it comes to issues of this kind. For a discussion on Thanksgiving, see Shaykh Luqman Ahmad's article [2http://imamluqman.wordpress.com/2013/11/20/the-islamic-ruling-regarding-celebrating-thanksgiving-day-by-shaykh-abu-laith-luqman-ahmad-2//[/url] . For an opposing view, as well as an interesting analysis of popular television programs, music and even Biblical texts, see the book Symbolism, Holidays, Myths and Signs by Imam Alauddin Shabazz [ 1993, New Mind Publications, Jersey City, New Jersey]